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Fast X

Published 2023-06-24

Fast X

Film info

  • Title Fast X
  • Director Louis Leterrier
  • Year 2023
  • Run time 2hr 22m
  • Genres Thriller, Action, Crime
  • Tagline The end of the road begins
  • Cast Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez, John Cena, Jason Momoa, Scott Eastwood, Helen Mirren, Brie Larson, Jason Statham, Charlize Theron, Rita Moreno

Ever since their saga started on the streets of L.A.'s underground racing scene, Dom Toretto and his family have overcome impossible odds to outsmart, out-nerve and outdrive every foe. Yet when the team took down a nefarious kingpin back in Brazil, they had no idea his son Dante was watching from the shadows. More lethal than any other enemy they've faced, Dante now rises as a terrifying new nemesis who's fueled by revenge and determined to shatter their family and destroy everything and everyone Dom loves. From London and Brazil to Antarctica and Rome, new alliances are forged and old enemies resurface. But everything changes after Dom discovers his 8-year-old son is Dante's ultimate target.

Live blog

TimeComment
3:36Oh wow, I remember the vault stuff. Back then we thought that was as ridiculous as it could get. Ha!
11:32"That's the problem nowadays, nobody listens anymore."
13:32Nope, not this song, not in this actual context.
16:13Ooh a posh DeLorean!
23:11Not helping my mistrust of lifts.
32:12It's all gone a bit Indiana Jones.
40:48Impossible that not a single life was lost in that attack.
42:03Did he just have this exposition presentation ready to go on the off chance someone walked in?
42:37"It's like a cult, with cars."
51:07It's nice when they remember that Big Brian is supposed to still exist.
1:03:06Ooh, old school racing!
1:08:08Oh sure, now we're in Star Wars where robots just patch you right up.
1:28:08So much wrong with this plane boat unloading in mid-flight situation.
1:30:18Yay Statham. We legit cheered.
1:40:58It's a CULT!
1:58:59Oh good, two helicopter crashes for the price of one. ARGH.
2:06:34Someone had to 3D design Vin's biceps and I'm just volunteering for that.
2:07:24NO SHE DIED THIS IS STUPID.

Thoughts

So annoyed at this film.

I thought it was doing okay - you know, the regular kind of stupid that you expect from this franchise. It was laughable but fully entertaining and bizarre in all the right ways. I LOVED how much fun Jason Mamoa was having in this role, he was head and shoulders above everyone else, the best thing in it.

Plenty of questions, like what was the powder Roman was throwing, how is it possible no one died from the bomb, how did the dam not smash apart, how did Dom get his car to Rio, how did the agency guy have the film footage of the submarine chase, what happened to Scott Eastwood once he jumped from the exploding truck, and on and on and on...

But it was the end that really ruined the whole thing. It wasn't an end, it was a cliffhanger question mark all by itself, and WTF was Gal Gadot doing popping out of a submarine? We watched her die, we mourned her along with Han and oop, no, turns out she was scraped up off the runway at some point and is now going to save the day. WHAT?

It's absolutely infuriating... and yet, I'm confident we will be ready to watch Fast 11 when it rolls around. It really is a cult with cars.

Rating: 1 / 5

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